Guak The Narc

While I was at Ruski's this past Saturday night I got a text from Bethlynne: there was a party going on in our building, and they were keeping her up. In addition, the revelers woke up The Coolest Baby In The USA. Fuckers.

I already knew there was a party underway, thrown by the ladies from the first floor. I'm pretty sure it was to celebrate the birthday of the girl who on Memorial Day had drunkenly called me "The Infamous Guak" and gave me a long hug.

Bethlynne texted me again to tell me she had shut the window and hopefully that would do the trick. Apparently it did because I didn't hear from her for the rest of the night.

But about twenty minutes later I got a text from Sofia about how loud the fucking party was. The problem was that they were hanging out on the stoop. About thirty of them.

I found that out firsthand when I walked past the building at around 2am. Rob wanted to walk to Cumberland Farms. I had no need for Cumby's, having purchased a bag of chips earlier in the evening as a preemptive strike. But I decided to accompany nonetheless.

I saw the loud bullshit going on and got as far as Reiche when I decided to call the cops. So I did. I gave the dispatcher my name and phone number. She asked me if I wanted to make a statement. I told her I did not, but I would if it was necessary. The dispatcher informed that it probably wouldn't be.

The cops didn't take long getting there. I was talking nerdy things with the cashier when I looked out the the window and noticed two cruisers driving up Pine Street and turning left towards the direction of my building.

Walking back I noticed a slow but steady stream of youngsters make its way out of the building and soon enough it was quiet as a mouse. I felt quite the feeling of accomplishment.

Part of me though wonders if it's a sign of me getting older. I had at least ten years on the average person at that party. Yet, truth be told, the party probably wouldn't have bothered me so much. My work demands that I stay up way into the wee hours of the morn, and even on my days off it's rare that I'm asleep before three. If those kids were going strong at that hour I reckon I could have drowned out the noise with my fan No, the fact is I did it for the ladies and Boy Wonder of Fort Bitchin' - I'm rather fond of that triad of awesomeness. And I was rather miffed that they were being kept awake by a slew of raucous celebrants.

That was the first time I ever ratted someone out to the cops. I guess that makes me a narc, and I would do it again.